Are you stuck on a cruise ship full of people during the corona crisis again? Ever wondered what to say to that inept neighbor from the next cabin who’s on a mission to vaccinate—oh, I mean, who doesn’t want to vaccinate everybody? Well, wonder no more! These euphemisms telling people they are stupid, as suggested by various Reddit users, will cut straight to the chase. And no tinfoil hat can save them now.
A Reddit user by the name of u/lientubay asked the world “What’s the best euphemism for telling people that they’re stupid?” More than 60 thousand people had apparently pondered the same question and the thread skyrocketed. People from all around the world shared various ways to insult stupid people politely by using both modern ingenuity and old folk proverbs.
Finally, instead of awkwardly using the same insult over and over again like “so is your face,” we can once again feel confident in ourselves when encountering a stupid person. What a tough world for us—intelligent people—this is. Thanks for making our life bearable, Reddit!
More Info: Reddit
In russian we have “intelligent thoughts have always followed him, but he was faster”.
Sharp as a marble, that one.
Image credits: randolotapus
I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong
Image credits: captainawesome1983
One of my personal favorites:
“They only got two brain cells and both of them are fighting for third place.”
Image credits: NostalgicPotat0
Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Image credits: dusty-kat
In Greece we say “when it was raining brains, you had an umbrella”
Image credits: GSavvage
It’s impossible to underestimate you
Image credits: Snugl-v301
You could hide your own Easter eggs.
Image credits: bdiz78
My teacher said I was as “quick as a glacier”…
Image credits: Hairydoggie
Now I know what Douglas Adams was talking about.
“A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.”
Image credits: BerenTheBold
I think I saw this one here previously “You aren’t the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don’t die”.
Image credits: soalindie
He’s so far behind he thinks he’s first.
Image credits: perstn
You’re the reason we have warning labels.
Image credits: igenus44
Ahh yes, “it’s better to be silent and thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt”. A classic.
The wheels spinning, but the hamsters dead.
Image credits: lburton273
If you were half as smart as you think you are, you’d be twice as smart as you really are.
His train of thought is still boarding at the station.
Image credits: Washjockey
I can explain it again, if you’d like, but I can’t understand for you.
“If you ever had a clever thought, it died alone and afraid.”
A village somewhere is missing their idiot.
He needs to carry a plant to make up for the oxygen he’s wasting
“I’m guessing you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling.”
-Captain Malcom Reynolds
Image credits: FlipSchitz
Unencumbered by the thought process.
Saw two coworkers going about a task in the worst way I could imagine. I said “I believe if there was a harder way to do that you two would find it.”
They didn’t get it.
“At this point, you can only impress me.”
Image credits: Roman_Suicide_Note
One of my all time favorites is “More foam than beer”.
Image credits: DoctorSalty
Once heard someone say “Well he’s about as sharp as a sock full of soup”.
Image credits: angrypunishment
If your brains were dynamite there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.
You could blow in their ear and they would say thanks for the refill.
“Well pardon me, ma’am but what you don’t know could fill a warehouse.”
Courtesy of Bart Simpson.